5 star series! Little Boy Lost by J.P. Barnaby
This is one of my favourite series. It tells the story of Brian McAllister and Jamie Mayfield. It is emotional and heartbreaking and so worth reading!
I thought it worth sharing my thoughts on the series as it is currently on special. The 2nd edition (different covers but same content to the books I have reviewed below) are currently on sale from Dreamspinner Press at 40% off.
- Enlightened (book #1)
- Abandoned (book #2)
- Vanished (book #3)
- Discovered (book #4)
- Escaped (book #5)
- Sacrificed (book #6)
Be warned that this series review might be slightly spoilerish as the blurbs for each subsequent books give a bit of the story that has already taken place in the series so far.
My rating: 5 of 5 stars
The Blurb…
Little Boy Lost is the story of Brian McAllister, the boy next door.
Brian goes to school, does his homework, and helps his foster parents around the house. Brian also has a secret. He is in love with his best friend. In Crayford, Alabama being in love with another boy is the worst kind of sin.
In this first book, Enlightened, Brian and Jamie discover just how deep their emotional bond runs, and at what cost. From fumbling through their first sexual experiences to shrouding every aspect of their relationship from everyone in their lives, Brian and Jamie battle for the one thing that is truly theirs — love. What will they do if their secret is discovered?
So what did I think?
From the opening line, “My name is Brian Patrick McAllister, and I am going to hell.” and launch straight into the pastor’s sermon, I knew this wouldn’t be an easy book.
It is the story, told by 16 year old Brian, of his developing sexuality – his realisation that his feelings for his best friend Jamie, extend beyond simple friendship. These feelings aren’t only sexual though, Brian and Jamie share a deep love for one another.
Living in a small town, Jamie’s parents are deeply religious and Brian is a foster child, worried about losing the only home he has felt wanted in since losing his parents as a young boy.
The boys try come to terms with being gay while trying to hide their feelings for each other from other people. They live in fear of repercussions. The story tells of their pain and is really moving.
“My question is, if god hates gay people and God made us, why would He make people He hated? I thought God was supposed to love everybody? Is it a test? Why me? Why you?”………….”I’m scared, Jamie”.
Warning: there is no happy ending in this book. The ending is certainly motivation to get straight into the next book. Hopefully, with so many books in the series, Brian and Jamie will eventually get their happy ever after.
My rating: 5 of 5 stars
The Blurb…
Jamie is gone. Brian’s secret has been revealed.
Brian McAllister’s story continues as he tries to cope with the loss of his best friend and soul mate amid the alienation and ridicule of his classmates. When hatred turns to violence, Brian narrows his focus to two goals: surviving and finding Jamie. Along the way he meets Adam, whose life has also been shattered by violence and cruelty. Can Adam fill the hole in Brian’s life left by Jamie’s absence? The answer will change everything.
So what did I think?
This is the sequel to Enlightened and continues the story of Brian, who has lost Jamie and now facing his small town knowing he is gay.
Unfortunately there are those who decide to ‘punish’ Brian with tragic consequences. The story follows Brian as he deals with physical recovery, fights to keep his foster parents and continues to deal with his sorrow at not knowing what has happened to Jamie.
There are some small bright lights in Brian’s otherwise bleak life, such as his loving foster parents.
Once again, lots of heartbreak and there is no happy ending but the series continues…….
My rating: 5 of 5 stars
The Blurb…
Brian McAllister’s story continues in San Diego, where he finds so much more than he ever expected: acceptance, friends, encouragement, and an entire world of sexual adventure he’d never dared to imagine back in his small Alabama town. He continues to search for one lost boy in a sea of humanity but slowly begins to realize that maybe dreams really don’t come true.
Encouraged by new friends Mike and Emilio, Brian struggles to find work and keep his spirits up while his hope of finding Jamie starts to falter. But when life comes crashing down, he’s desperate to keep his new life. Can Brian do the unthinkable to remain in California when his money runs out? When Brian meets a beaten and bruised boy no one seems willing to help, he knows that walking away is no longer an option.
So what did I think?
The third book in the series sees Brian leave home and cross the country on his search for Jamie. The depth of his love is obviously as he sacrifices a college scholarship and secure future to find Jamie. For Brian, Jamie is his future.
Brian struggles to find work and enough money to fund his search but finds a new home and new friends who broaden his outlook. This book has a different feel to the earlier books as Brian is growing up and starts to further explore his sexuality. However it still filled with sorrow and heartache.
The direction Brian’s life starts to move in definitely was a surprise to me.
Warning: cliffhanger ending and the epilogue indicates that Brian faces many tough times and more heartbreak ahead
My rating: 5 of 5 stars
The Blurb…
Little Boy Lost is the story of Jamie Mayfield, a golden-haired fallen angel. Dumped into a gay rehab center and shunned by his parents, the once-adored son of small-minded, small town people has had to find his own way in life.
Jamie is astonished and dismayed when Brian McAllister, the boy he knows is the other half of his soul, explodes back into his precarious life. In the nearly two years they’ve been apart, not a day has gone by that Jamie hasn’t thought of Brian, no matter how hard surviving has been. How can Jamie protect Brian from the pain and brutalization in his life when he can’t even protect himself? Brian and Jamie will put every bit of themselves into saving each other, but Steven O’Dell isn’t the only obstacle keeping the boys apart. Jamie’s own self-hatred may prove to be their undoing.
So what did I think?
This 4th book in the series is told from Jamie’s point of view. We learn more about the pain he has been in since being wrenched from Brian 2 years ago.
“That night, that last beautiful night I held him in my arms, was the last time I had been happy. Even nearly two years later, I could still remember every touch, every whisper in the dark, every promise. That night, that experience changed my life. It made me want to be a better man, to take care of Brian the way that he should have been cared for his whole life. I wanted to go to college and get a great job so that I could be everything he needed. I never knew that I had that kind of capacity to love anyone else.”
Jamie is living in a world of hurt and fear. Jamie and Brian may have found each other again but they are not together. Jamie tries to distance himself from Brian to protect him from harm.
It is difficult to read of the heartbreak both these men are going through and I keep wanting them to have their happy ever after. Maybe in the next book? The whole series is difficult to put down due to the endings and epilogues which drag you straight into the next book.
My rating: 5 of 5 stars
The Blurb…
Finally together, Brian McAllister and Jamie Mayfield have risked everything in a desperate escape. Jamie is now free of his tormentor, Steven O’Dell… for the moment. But Brian and Jamie know that one wrong choice could lead Steven to their door.
With the strength of Brian and his friends to protect him, Jamie hides and finds the one person he is truly afraid of—himself. The long, lonely hours in the place Leo found for them to stay leave Jamie with nothing to do but think. He thinks about Brian, about the direction their lives should take. He thinks about his parents, about the industry he left behind. Mostly, though, he thinks about drugs. Jamie wants to feel good again, forget about his self-hatred, and stop the gnawing cravings that prey upon his mind and body even as he tries to start a new life with Brian.
One moment of weakness may prove to be fatal for them both.
So what did I think?
The fifth book in the series, finally brings Brian and Jamie together. However they have a lot to overcome if they are to be happy. Jamie may be away from Steven and his influence but a lot of damage has already been done.
This continues to be a dark journey for Jamie as he fights to get well and struggles with his internal demons.
“I pushed away the thought that he would be better off finding someone whole, because he didn’t want someone whole – he wanted me.”
Once again, lots of emotional moments. Thank goodness I don’t have to wait for the final book to be released but can dive right in.
My rating: 5 of 5 stars
The Blurb…
Reunited with his father but missing the one man he loves more than any other, Jamie Mayfield attempts to put his life back together amid rehab, seizures, and the gutting loneliness of Brian’s rejection. As he tries to cope, Jamie finds that relying on his friends isn’t nearly as difficult as he’d imagined, and soon he can once again stand on his own two feet.
While recovering from his addiction, Jamie starts a new phase of his life at college, working to become the man Brian needs him to be. Only one question remains: Can Jamie earn Brian’s forgiveness and win back his trust, or will their love be sacrificed at the altar of Jamie’s demons?
Brian and Jamie’s epic journey comes to a close in this thrilling conclusion to the Little Boy Lost series.
So what did I think?
“I’m fighting for us. You are everything to me, Brian, and I am not going to give up on us – ever.”
This is the last book in the series and concludes the story of Brian and Jamie. In the tradition of the other books, the boys are not finding it easy to move forward, to get beyond the tragic situation that has been forced on them. Once again they are apart.
Although along with the heartache, here is healing. Jamie is getting his life together and finally has support and friends. Thank goodness he doesn’t give up on Brian and allow him to push him away. “I couldn’t breathe, I couldn’t think – nothing mattered except Brian and how devastated I would be if he pushed me away. But I needed to try, one more time, just to know that I’d done everything I could. I had to feel his lips against mine even if it destroyed me.
This book is filled with such wonderful expressions of love and the happy ending was worth waiting for!
To find out more about J.P. Barnaby and her books visit her website.
Note: You might be interested to read a slightly different take on this series. J.P. Barnaby, writing as fictional character Jamie Mayfield, is in the process of releasing the series aimed at a YA audience. The series is called Waiting for Forever. Check out Choices (book #1) which is currently available. Destiny (book 2) is due for release next month (July 2013).
Buy the Little Boy Lost series from Amazon (Click on my Favourites category).